Once in a Blue Moon . . .

I jumped the gun last night rushing out to photograph the August 2012 Blue Moon. The moon will be officially full tonight.

Sometimes you get a second chance to correct mistakes, poor decisions, misunderstandings and injustices that have been committed.

Tonight I will be able to correct my error in dates and photographs, but that's an easy fix. I have another error that isn't going to be as easy to fix. I rushed to take care of the written separation between my husband and myself because I wanted to be done with it and him. Now, because I didn't insist that he contribute to the summer expenses when our daughter was home, and to provide me with an emergency fund, I am having to steal from Peter to pay Paul.

Wouldn't it be fun if it really was blue!!

I thought I was smarter than this, but I have allowed someone to put me in a very uncomfortable and unfamiliar situation.

I cannot emphasis enough how important it is for women to remain in control of their lives, and not become dependent on another person. No matter how much you think they will love you, take care of you, and never hurt you, there are no guarantees. 

Enjoy the Blue Moon, TONIGHT, August 31, 2012!!!

Symbolism?

I'm very good at keeping myself busy. For example: Today I cleaned the appliances in the kitchen, washed the kitchen floor, pulled weeds around the front garden, and went through an app that helps you learn French. This evening I had a long, leisurely dinner with my bestie. 

While I was in the garden today, I noticed a monarch butterfly on the butterfly bush. When I looked more closely, I saw that the bush was full of butterflies and hummingbird moths. It was a sign that I needed to get my camera and see what I could capture.

When my daughter was a little girl, we raised Painted Lady butterflies each spring for three or four years. We even took some cocoons on vacation with us one year because I thought that the butterflies would hatch while we were gone - - they waited until we got back home.

Watching the entire process: from egg, to caterpillar, to chrysalis, to butterfly, you appreciate the complexity, the beauty, the fragility, and the importance of each stage this tiny being goes through to emerge as a beautiful butterfly. 

I'm seeing a correlation between the birth of a butterfly, and my birth as an independent woman. Once the stages of metamorphoses are complete, I, just like the butterfly, will embrace my new environment and my new body. The temporary time I will spend alone, staying busy and focused, will only be until the next stage is complete.  

The waiting is over!

I am now the epitome of an Empty Nester - - no child, and no husband.

Knowing what was in store for me last week, I provided myself with the ultimate distraction - - I packed up my cat and my two betta fish, and I ran away from home, right into the arms of my family. 

Between my daughter going back to school, and my husband pulling a moving van into my driveway, I knew I couldn't be here to watch. I was also very sure that I was not going to help him pack, so I left for nine days and stayed on the farm with my mother, sister, llamas, goats, horses, cats and a dog - - what more could a girl ask for?

The day after my husband left, I packed up my cat and fish once again and we headed home. I tried to brace myself for what I knew awaited me; but still, I felt the pain when I got home and familiar things were missing, the garage was void of tools and unfinished projects, and some rooms were very sparse. I walked through the house in disbelief. I’m still in shock that this has all transpired in ten months. 

The oddest part of coming home and finding everything different was that my husband had emptied all the wastebaskets and trashcans, cleaned all the bathrooms, vacuumed, and left me a note. The care that he took to leave everything in clean and orderly condition took me by surprise. Although he has been organized and considerate during our marriage, he has not been as considerate for the last ten months.

I am thankful that his last act, in the home that we shared, was respectful. I’m just sorry that he was unable to do that for the last ten months. What a different experience this would have been.

The waiting is over, and I have successfully completed my first, stress-free day on my own.

A thistle from the farm.

The thistle is renowned in Scotland where it is not only the country's national emblem, but also the base of Scotland's ancient order of chivalry known as "The Order of the Thistle." Oral tradition attributes this to a war between the Scottish and the Vikings of Denmark. When the Vikings attempted to surprise the Scots at night, one of them supposedly placed a bare foot on a thistle, causing him to cry out in pain and alerting the Scots to the Vikings' presence.

Read more: What Is the Meaning of the Thistle? | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/about_6724260_meaning-thistle_.html#ixzz24iAXfzua

Pictures from my week at the farm:

http://www.evalightfootphotos.com/LowerSherwoodFarm/August-16-24-2012/24986051_gkDnz3#!i=2047055571&k=J8Sb8S4

A very full week . . .

It's hard to believe the summer is winding down and my daughter is heading back to school on Friday.

She's been home since the end of April. She got a week off and then was right back to the books while she challenged and conquered three summer classes - - getting an "A"in Statistics













Once she finished her classes, she was on her way to Paris with her paternal grandmother. When she got home and we were able to make some plans.

We planned a two day trip to Ocean City. We both got into the ocean and I got to parasail.

When we got home we checked on Nanny Goose because she had been left behind by her Canada goose family and was looking very lost and sad when we left earlier in the week.

The following day we made the trip to Annapolis for a two hour ride in a 57' schooner. There wasn't any wind, so it was a slow motor down the Severn River.











On Sunday we went into DC to take pictures. We found the newly renovated Bartholdi fountain and the Botanical Garden.












Tomorrow my buddy will be going back to school to start her Junior year. I will miss her, but I think it's going to be an amazing year for her.

Thank you for a fun summer!!!!!

Ocean City:

http://www.evalightfootphotos.com/Family/Ocean-City-August-7-8-and-9/24699004_k7RzDp#!i=2019623288&k=jDp5gJ5

Severn River:

http://www.evalightfootphotos.com/Landscapes/Annapolis-August-11-2012/24698172_6N7tQp#!i=2019556200&k=79nQbCD

Washington DC:

http://www.evalightfootphotos.com/Portraits/Carrie-and-Albert/24722241_vLJLDp#!i=2021791233&k=fSbF2m3

Sitting on the edge of my seat . . .

waiting!


Seems I've done that for most of my life.


Right now I'm waiting for it to rain, but that's just a very small thing on a much grander scale.


I couldn't wait to grow up. I couldn't wait to be finished with school. I couldn't wait to experience the world. I couldn't wait to find someone special. I couldn't wait to have a child. I couldn't wait for that child to grow up. I couldn't wait until we retired. I couldn't wait to visit and see all the places and things on my long list of things to wait for. I couldn't wait to find my niche in life.


Now I'm waiting for the day when I am alone and starting my new life as a single, middle-aged, unemployed, mother of a college student who is counting the minutes until she is back at school.


Apprehension doesn't quite cover how I've been feeling the last few months waiting for this big day, but as the day grows closer, I'm starting to feel just the slightest twinge of excitement about what lies ahead.

These are some of the things on my desk that distract me from the waiting game. 

No, I don't gamble; I like to roll the dice in my hands when I'm thinking.

I have had people whom I've only met online, who have reached out to encourage me on my new journey. They have become part of my long distance family, and I hope I'm able to add to their lives as much as they have added to mine.


The time has come to stop waiting and to start living - - and maybe even start meeting the people who have become a part of my life!